Push

 I took hold of the horn of the saddle and hoisted myself up, for the first time in several weeks. The more time that passes between rides, the more apprehensive I am.He hasn't been good for me this spring. He has been acting like a young stallion. Many times I find myself downright scared.

 But tonight I took him from the pasture where he had already expended much of his extra energy. He was relatively calm. I gathered up my reins and said, (out loud and didn't care much who heard me)
 "I once galloped this horse across an open field. I once barrel raced with no fear. I once jumped fences with great joy. I can do this."

 We had a great first 10 minutes. We walked, we jogged. My lower back ached. I thought, OK, I don't want to push it. I don't want to hurt myself. What would my chiropractor say? That's enough for today.

 

But the kids were playing hide and seek in the wheat field, no chores awaited me at home, nothing was pulling me down from my horse but my own lack of self discipline.

 Mustering up all the courage I had left, I collected him and asked for a lope. He obeyed immediately and off we went.. An onlooker would not have noticed anything unusual. Plenty of young children can lope their horse. I was once one of them. But his, to me, was exhilarating.
 I had conquered my fear.

 ...backing up a couple hours:

 dinner was complete. bedtime was drawing near. I was faced with the decision of what will we do tonight.The answer is most always made unconsciously. Clean a little, watch a little TV, play on the computer a little, but nothing memorable.
Or give myself a push... "Whoever wants to go to the barn, get in the car!"
The do nothing evenings are also wonderful, and necessary.
 But sometimes a little (or big) push is needed to make a memorable moment.

Snowmen

"Take your hat off so I can get a nice picture of you."

"No. I like my hat and I'm not ashamed of it."

It was another gorgeous day.

The sun was shining.

The snow was perfect for snowmen making.

Tony is not afraid to jump right in and play with the kids, no matter the weather. I have gotten lazy over the years and the cold scares me away. I am perfectly content with my excuse to have to stay with the baby in the house. But this day, I couldn't resist. I didn't get my hands wet, mind you. But I was out there.

He's happy now, because Daddy helped him finish his snowman, but a few minutes earlier, he was crying because it didn't have a head.

"Then make a head."

"I did but Jacob ate it!"

The finished product was pretty impressive.

The Bear

After dinner, Mom and I and Joshua walked down the road to bring the trash to the dumpster. A family in a cabin nearby yelled to us and directed our attention to a bear headed to the same dumpster. Whoa! We sidestepped down to our neighbor's cabin and watched as the bear made it's way back up the road and past another cabin where several people were sitting around their campfire. That is, until they spotted the bear. They scattered at the sight of him and spooked him, sending him running toward our cabins.



"Bear! There's a BEAR!" I yelled to my family, thinking of the boys that had been playing in the creek and hoping that Grace was close to an adult.

Then I spotted Courtney. She was walking through the woods to Mema's cabin and she was right in the bears path! She heard me and the other campers yelling and looked up to see this bear barreling down the hill right at her.

I have never seen her move so fast.

She ran to Mema's cabin, locked the door behind her and crawled up into the top bunk. To add to the trauma of it all, there was no one in the cabin. She was going up to help Mema with the dishes but she was already down at the bathroom (no running water in the cabins) so Courtney was alone until the bear cleared the area and I could go and get her.

So how big was this bear? This big...



Mema missed the whole thing. We all filled her in on the excitement. She was so upset that she didn't get to see it.



She was pretty shook up about it. Well, I sure would be, too. But it didn't keep her down long. She lagged behind on the trails, wasn't afraid to wander over to the other cabin alone, sat at the campfire without being afraid of what was out there in the dark... she's a brave, brave soul.

My Girls

-Taking in the scenery on this evening's bike ride.

"You don't know what it's like to be the oldest."
She's right, I don't. I was the youngest and I was spoiled, or so I've been told. But I told her that God put her in the position she is in for a reason. And everything that she experiences while she's in this house will make her into the adult she is to become.


Your oldest children are your Ginnie Pigs. They are the ones that get you before you read up on the parenting books. They get stuck with the curriculum that you discovered was not as great as you hoped. They are the ones that get the hardest chores. They are the baby holders, the little sister chasers, the sandwich makers... my biggest helpers.
I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate them and how much I depend on them.

While sitting on the swing with Paige, watching the kids play, I said "In about 5 years, Joshua will be old enough that we wont have to keep an eye on him every minute. All the kids will be big enough that we can relax and go to the park without running after any babies. Wont that be nice?"
But then it hit me - Paige will be 17 in 5 years. She will be almost out of the house. When I have the opportunity to give her my undivided attention, she'll be too old to want it.

The time is now to savor every moment, to take any opportunity I can to spend a quality moment with my still young children, to have a quiet conversation while we swing, to take a bike ride after the little ones are in bed.

They enjoy playing with Grace. They love snuggling with Joshua. Who wouldn't?
My goal for them is that they benefit and develop stronger character from the added responsibility of their position in the family.

Some day they'll look back and say, "Remember when Grace was two and..."
And Grace will be there to hear the story because they are taking the time to build a relationship now that will last for the rest of their lives.


Well, here's hopin' anyway...